A Distinction Must Be Made Between The False Notion That Discipline Is "Mean" And The Reality Of Truly Mean Discipline

A critical distinction must be made between the false notion, on the one hand, that discipline in and of itself is mean, and the reality, on the other, of truly mean discipline. Certainly we can be mean as we discipline. We can verbally pummel, demean, and fling all kinds of unnecessary and hurtful words and emotions. By virtue of our human weakness, all parents are prone to some mean discipline. Good parents work hard for years to reduce its presence. Yet setting firm limits and holding children accountable for their actions is not mean at all. It is love in action. It is love that is hard for children to comprehend. Nonetheless, it is love that will endure long beyond our lifetimes in the character of the next generation we leave behind on this earth. - Dr. Ray Guarendi